So I know I have not posted on here in a very long time. It is crazy how busy life can get and how things like blogging become lost. This semester I have really gained such a heart for spending time with my Heavenly Father over getting on the computer, talking on the phone, and sometimes even hanging out with people. There is something about spending time with my Abba that fulfills me in ways no one else here on earth ever will!
My summer is going to be quite different, yet again from “a normal one.” I went home for spring break at the end of March and I couldn’t find a job ANYWHERE. I guess that is what I get from living in a small, town surrounded by mountains with only local businesses. While I do LOVE where I live because of the beauty, there is little for me to do there. I came back to school not knowing what to do. After a perfect internship was lined up for me, it fell through. I was feeling pretty discouraged so I leaned to my comfort–applying for a summer camp counselor position. However, I received an e-mail from my staff here at Salisbury informing me that the Ocean City Summer Project needed another female student leader. Its funny that this happened because back in January I wanted to apply for a student staff position, I just didn’t know where? I prayed and felt the Lord calling me to apply…I was accepted 3 days later! PRAISE GOD.
As I embark on this next adventure with God, I am excited. I know God is going to use me and work through me. After leading women’s ministry for a year and joining the leadership team for a semester, I feel somewhat prepared. Although God always takes me by surprise and I am often never prepared until I am walking with him through whatever it may be. I am so joyful to be able to serve on the OCMDSP team with other godly men and women. I know this experience will help me decide if joining staff with Crusade is something I will want to do next year. I feel so blessed to be able to pour into other women. I know after being in Hampton Beach for a full 10 weeks last summer, that this experience will once again fill me up for another full year of student-led ministry at Salisbury and renew me with new insights, ideas, and strength. I think the thing I am most looking forward to is pouring into the women I will be discipling, leading a bible study, and training. The one thing I am most passionate about in ministry is the heart Jesus has for women. In the Bible Jesus often talks about women. In fact, while at the time everyone else condemned women and found them a disgrace, Jesus loved them and healed them. His heart for women is undeniable and something I think so many men and even some women don’t realize. Jesus talked about women in his parables and at the cross, the women were the first and last ones! When Jesus came back, he FIRST talked to Mary as well…how crazy! He wanted Mary to go and tell his disciples. It just blows my mind. It truly leaves me speechless. I feel blessed to have an ounce of Jesus’ heart for women. In my prayers for these godly women I will be discipling, God has already given me such a heart. While I do not know their names, who they are, or their stories, I have begun to pray for them daily. I know God has led them to OCMD for a reason and I cannot wait to hear their stories of how they got there and how God has radically transformed their lives.
I think being a woman in this world is so difficult at times. I remember last summer right before I was about to leave I felt so anxious and doubted I was doing what “was right”…because to the world what I was about to do was crazy. But praise God for the life-change on HBSP and how he showed me who I truly am in Christ and that my identity is found no where else besides through him. He is my Prince of Peace and my Comforter. He picks me up out of my darkest moments and leads me back to his path of light. He satisfies my like no other man ever can or will. He is my lover and my Father. I am hoping the students are as excited about what God is going to do through them and how he is going to change them. I feel so blessed to be able to almost take a step back this year and watch how the students are changing. God has literally given me such an interesting perspective this summer and I cannot WAIT!
God has again stripped me of money worries. Two weeks ago I had $300, after a crazy story, I now have $288 OVER the amount I had to raise! This is again confirmation that God definitely wants me in OCMD as student staff. Its funny how each year I have had to raise support, God somehow surprises me one way or another. Last year I had all my support raised by April, which was golden for me but that was also the time when Satan began having a stronghold in my life and attacking every small thing he could because I let him. This year, while I was accepted very late and almost last minute, I felt doubtful I could raise the amount in such a short amount of time. Well, God did it again! He provided me in full with money to pay for food 1.5 weeks before I am to report to OCMD! PRAISE HIM! I know after raising support for two summer projects, if he is calling me to join staff next year, he will provide. Trusting in all his timing and ways and having hope in the people he loves overcomes all fear, all worry, all doubt, and lies.
While I am very very excited, I am also nervous. After leading all year in a student-led ministry, I have seen the ups and downs, the successes and failures. It has been rough but also so awesome to see God at work and be a part of it all. The one thing I truly admire in a person is godly wisdom and pure truth from the bible. I want to do just this for the women God has entrusted me with. I want to pour truth into them and be a godly woman they trust and look up to. I think the thing that makes me most nervous is just personality clashes. BUT, I DO KNOW that personalities mean nothing…the love of God conquers all. If people have the same mind set and goals, (to follow God and strive to honor and live out his word) then it doesn’t matter who you are or what kind of person you are. I pray I can pour out the love of God into these women. I know it is going to be different at first but I also know God wouldn’t have led me to OCMDSP or provided me with money if he didn’t believe and know I can be that woman of God he desires me to be, the woman after his heart.
I will try to blog at the end of each week to tell of all God has been doing in my life and the lives of the students at OCMDSP. I am excited for all that God is going to do and looking forward to helping take a part in furthering his kingdom yet again in a more fruitful part of the United States!
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